Today woke up late again,can't help lar, no alarm clock, no need to go to skool, mum need help oso nv call me to wake up. Did some exercises and watched some old tapes to draw more inspiration. after tt went for guitar lesson. Again lar it's me holding back the class, sometimes i tink i'm not the guitar playing type but den i could play what he taught dere. Tink i need more practice... ya tink that's what i need. After guitar lesson , went around the place with randall, he was like searching for someting for Sarah. i didn't know why until he told me sarah gave him a watch for christmas. And i was like that watch aint cheat. no wonder he was looking for someting to give her.

Had a chat with alexandra, she said i've changed. She said i used to be super positive , full of determination...
I was tinking she might be right. I guess she's rite. in the past i'm very cheerful, and now i dun feel that cheerfulness anymore. Mayb it becos i haven got aniting to cheer about for a long time. That day i was playing starcraft with kevin alex and meng, i was very happy cos we were winning, but den when we were about to win, they decided to dessimate my base. Although i know it's for fun, it actually takes the joy out of the game. it also sometimes make me feel that they dun spare a thought for my feeling. From this i feel that even the simple joys i have is gone.

After watching a walk to remember, i actually can feel how Shane West's charactor felt about life. When one has gone
a few setbacks , be it minor or major, we tend to lose faith and sight of our goals. Mayb that the state i'm in now.