One Things leads to another

Well, i posted earlier on but somehow one thing just led to another and i'm back here again. Well, it's started with me reading a corrinne may email update and then remembering how i was supposed to go her concert with a friend but it never materialized cos the tix were sold out and then remembering how i loved her songs and those entrancing music and somehow it led to fervent surfing of the net and sampling on pop songs and old favourites. and then in the span of these 3 years, i tot i have grown, i have matured but then i realised that i haven really change. Deep inside, i'm still me, nothing much have really changed, the circumstances are different, the experiences i have gained are more but in essence, many things still remained the same.

i'm still chasing after the same tings, Love, Recognition, Fulfillment, activity, growth, change. The tunes of goo goo dolls, avril, euro beats/techno still leaves that "feel good" experience, whether i encounter something beautiful, i still envision that there was someone beside me to share the moment, a friend mayb, a lover, a companion. and i discover that my life plan is not being realised, because the steps to getting there are not being fulfilled. not going out there to experience life to the fullest, live life full of apprenhension and skeptism, hoping foolishly for serendipitious things to happen. maybe it's really time that we act on our plans and realise them,

Life's Entropy

Laziness, Sloth, Procrastination, Fear, indiscipline, detachment, discernment, disengagement, pacifism.

Well this has been what my life feels like more often than not these days. The desire to improve and grow and fulfill my goals toss to the corner of my minds, with onli a few moments each when i'm interacting that i discover how LL i've become and how try to do things for myself requires the a substantial amount of energy. Well today i did get some work done. I restart on my NYAA report. Hopefully in 2 weeks at the most, i can be happily telling everyone that i've completed my report. Well on a comforting note, i'm nearing the end of my driving, with just a few more lessons to go and an intense need to get a better date for my driving test and hopefully passing it on the first attempt.

Thinking about it, life's seriously got to move on, and at a quicker pace at that, like wad neil armstrong said, "one small step, one giant leap for mankind". Everything starts small, i truly hope that i will be doing the tings i really need to be doing in the next few months ahead.

Oh btw, i'm at Pacific Coffee company at Vivo City and i have to say, it's one of the most crowded places at virtually every moment of the day. the ambience is great. not only on the inside but the outdoor deck is spectacular as well with swing seats and lounging chairs with the warm afternoon blowing at your face.

One last headache on my mind now is to apply for NTU or SMU, well i guess NTU will ultimately still be my choice because of a number of things namely, its 3 year direct honours programme, it's second specialisation option much like poly, it's highly ranked finance faculty, its combination of lecture and tutorial style in year 1 and a transition to seminar style thereafter. The downside, its civlization away from civilization lifestyle, the lack of a double degree programme. But then even these are debatable, like for example, it's does has it's romantic and serene charm compared to the cosmospolitan SMU, and what it makes so sure that's i'll be able to cope with a doube degree when so many when transited from poly to uni have failed. Well afterall, a piece of paper is a piece of paper. It does have a certain bearing to your future. but i doesn't distinguish you as a person in its entirety. well guess i've made my mind afterall :)